A Transitional Video

When I became curious about actually transitioning to female I would often go to various websites to look at other trans girls to see their progress. As I browsed more and more sites, I would become more and more depressed knowing "I will NEVER look like that!" In the end, I did myself a real disservice. I remember looking at these websites back in 1997. I waited another 15 years until I decided to transition!

Sometimes, we get too caught up on trying to convince ourselves that we will never pass (and I really don't like that word "pass" but that's for another blog) that we end up creating our own self dreaded prophecy of either having a very rocky transition or no transition at all!

You have to try to go beyond your own perceived self image and realize there is a wonderful person trying to get out. Mirrors are a horrible thing when you know you are presenting in the wrong gender and your mind can be an equally horrible thing if you keep on putting yourself down than you will never transition successfully like the other girls and guys out there.

I remember seeing a website shortly after I made the conscious decision to finally transition. I don't remember the web address and good lord, if I did I would never share it with you all! The website was a very long page of how awful her transition was and is. She talked about the misery, the pain, the loss, the hurt of transitioning. She "tried" to dispel the rumours that transitioning was a positive experience and made it sound like it can only be this gut wrenching "storming the beaches of Normandy with high causality" destination to cross genders.

The site was so bad I sat there in grief and shock. If I was not rooted in my foundation to transition, that website would have scared me away from being really me for another 15 years!! That poor website author was miserable when she presented male and she was miserable now she was presenting female. I am sure her horrible transition experience had other "co morbid factors" involved.

There is never a sugar coating to transition. I need to say that. Transitioning will present it's own challenges and possible heartaches but it is no different than any other life changing task you may take on in life. It has its ups and downs and its twists and turns. Sometimes transitioning is like walking on the beach with a lover and other times it is like tripping over that obscure twig as you run away from a zombie hockey wearing ax murderer! Other times transitioning can feel like a curse and other times it can feel like a blessing....like the heavens had parted and Goddess herself has touched your lips.

The process of transitioning and the method in which you do it is completely up to you and you are in control of it. As long as you are following the good graces of your therapist, there is no wrong way to transition. If you try to do it without any support whatsoever you may end up being another webpage author who writes a 24,000 worded essay of how horrible the transition is.

You can approach that mirror and say to yourself "I can do this! I deserve it! This is right for me!"

I recently made a video of my transition and I want to show it here to all of you. I made this video solely on the issue that I want to help girls and guys realize their true potential of transitioning to the gender you were meant to be. If I can do this as a 320 pound bearded man with XX chromosome disorder, anyone can do this if they have the conviction and heart for it!